Eh..teman,
Aku punya cerita nih yang lucu banget, Waktu aku di
SMAN 1 Jorong dulu kan, aku punya genk, nama genk
ku D'CRUT, terus kami dalam 1 genk tersebut itu ada 5 orang, tapi ada 1 di antara kami, yang sangat gokil gila, namanya LIZNA, dia mirip sekali sama NUNUNG OVJ, ada juga ITIN, dia kayak preman kebakaran jenggot, ada
lagi YEYEN, dia itu punya badan paling gemuk di antara kami semua, sampai-sampai mirip sama gajah bengkak, terus rinny, dia paling takut kalau ada angin,karena bisa melayang, abis dia paling kurus di genk kami,
Heeeeeee...
Dan kalau aku paling caem di genk ku...
Hahaay Prikitiwww
By YANA D'CRUT/ YANA BABY FUNK
Senin, 26 September 2011
(Story) SMAN 1 Jorong, Permusuhan antara 2 Genk
Ada sebuah kisah,
Pada suatu hari, tepatnya pada musin mangga, ada perseteruan yang sangat
mengejutkan semua orang di dalam kelas XII.IS.1, apa kah yang terjadi???
Di dalam kelas XII.IS.1 terdapat banyak GENK ,, termasuk genk ambalat dan genk
tabuan yang sangat bermusuhan... Lalu pada suatu hari bukan genk ambalat dan
genk tabuan yg mushan, tapi antara genk ambalat sendiri, yaitu satu laki-laki
dan satunya lagi prempuan, apa kah yang terjadi???
Hee ternyata ada pisau terbang,, dan semua pada tau kan apa sebabnya mereka
berkelahi, (yup olok-olokan nama orang tua),,!
semua orang terkejut,, termasuk aku hee hee
By Tia Paman MUHIIIIIIID
Pada suatu hari, tepatnya pada musin mangga, ada perseteruan yang sangat
mengejutkan semua orang di dalam kelas XII.IS.1, apa kah yang terjadi???
Di dalam kelas XII.IS.1 terdapat banyak GENK ,, termasuk genk ambalat dan genk
tabuan yang sangat bermusuhan... Lalu pada suatu hari bukan genk ambalat dan
genk tabuan yg mushan, tapi antara genk ambalat sendiri, yaitu satu laki-laki
dan satunya lagi prempuan, apa kah yang terjadi???
Hee ternyata ada pisau terbang,, dan semua pada tau kan apa sebabnya mereka
berkelahi, (yup olok-olokan nama orang tua),,!
semua orang terkejut,, termasuk aku hee hee
By Tia Paman MUHIIIIIIID
(Puisi) Untukmu Seorang
Ku kirimkan ''puisi'' Sebagai
''TEMAN'' untuk mengukir
Mimpi indahmu
Ku kirimkan Selimut ''PERHATIAN'' untuk memberimu
''KEHANGATAN'' Disepanjang malammu
dan.....
Ku kirimkan ''DOA'' untuk menjaga tidurmu hingga pagi kembali menyambutmu..
By mynch (sexi_na_z4n6kun5)
''TEMAN'' untuk mengukir
Mimpi indahmu
Ku kirimkan Selimut ''PERHATIAN'' untuk memberimu
''KEHANGATAN'' Disepanjang malammu
dan.....
Ku kirimkan ''DOA'' untuk menjaga tidurmu hingga pagi kembali menyambutmu..
By mynch (sexi_na_z4n6kun5)
(Joke) Job Performance Review
"Suppose," says the old salt of a sea captain, testing
his new recruit, "that a sudden storm springs up on
your starboard side. What would you do?" "Throw out an anchor, sir," says the new sailor. "And what would you do if another storm sprang up
aft?" "Throw out another anchor, sir," the raw recruit
replies. "Now," says the captain, "a storm springs up forward
of the ship. What would you do this time?" "Throw out another anchor, Captain." "Hold on, hold on. Where are you getting all these
anchors from?" "From the same place you're getting your storms, sir,"
replied the new recruit. He got to keep his job. Received from Thomas Ellsworth.d you do?" "Throw out an anchor, sir," says the new sailor. "And what would you do if another storm sprang up
aft?" "Throw out another anchor, sir," the raw recruit
replies. "Now," says the captain, "a storm springs up forward
of the ship. What would you do this time?" "Throw out another anchor, Captain." "Hold on, hold on. Where are you getting all these
anchors from?" "From the same place you're getting your storms, sir,"
replied the new recruit. He got to keep his job. Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
his new recruit, "that a sudden storm springs up on
your starboard side. What would you do?" "Throw out an anchor, sir," says the new sailor. "And what would you do if another storm sprang up
aft?" "Throw out another anchor, sir," the raw recruit
replies. "Now," says the captain, "a storm springs up forward
of the ship. What would you do this time?" "Throw out another anchor, Captain." "Hold on, hold on. Where are you getting all these
anchors from?" "From the same place you're getting your storms, sir,"
replied the new recruit. He got to keep his job. Received from Thomas Ellsworth.d you do?" "Throw out an anchor, sir," says the new sailor. "And what would you do if another storm sprang up
aft?" "Throw out another anchor, sir," the raw recruit
replies. "Now," says the captain, "a storm springs up forward
of the ship. What would you do this time?" "Throw out another anchor, Captain." "Hold on, hold on. Where are you getting all these
anchors from?" "From the same place you're getting your storms, sir,"
replied the new recruit. He got to keep his job. Received from Thomas Ellsworth.
(Joke) Football story
As another successful donation drive comes to an
end, I want you all to know I really appreciate your
continued generosity and commitment to GCFL. We
plan to continue sending good, clean funnies to as
many as possible for free. Thank you all for your
support. If you didn't get a chance to donate during the drive, you are in luck! We accept donations anytime. We just won't nag you about it for the next six months or
so. Thanks, John. */ Why do Nebraska football players like smart women?
Opposites attract. Why was O.J. trying to escape to Knoxville, Tennessee?
Police would never look for a Heisman Trophy winner
there. Why was O.J. considering moving to West Virginia?
Everyone's DNA there is the same. Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?
So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday,
go hunting on Sunday, and wear it to pick up trash on
Monday. How do you get a former Ohio State football player
off your porch?
Pay him for the pizza. An Alabama fan and a Tennessee fan, fighting side-
by-side, were captured during World War II and
sentenced to die by firing squad. The enemy
commander asked the Tennessee fan if he had any last
requests. The Vol said, "I want to hear Rocky Top one
last time." The Bama fan was then asked if he had any last
requests. "Yes, shoot me first!" A man is sitting at a park bench when another man
sits next to him and they engage in conversation.
Shortly after, the second man says, "So, I bet you're a
Texas fan."
The first man says enthusiastically, "Why, yes I am.
How did you know? My intelligence? My wit? My good looks?"
The second fellow says, "No. I saw your class ring when
you were picking your nose." A scrawny man at a bar in Columbus says to the guy
sitting next to him, "Hey, you want to hear a really
funny Ohio State joke?"
The guy replies, "Hey, buddy. See the bartender? He
played at Ohio State. See those two huge guys to your
left? They played at Ohio State. See that group of big guys over at that table? All Ohio State football
players. Look at me. I'm 6'4, 235, and played at Ohio
State. Now are you sure you want to tell me your
joke?"
The scrawny man says, "Nah. I don't want to have to
explain and repeat it five times." How can you spot a Tennessee fan at a wedding?
Just look for the guy in the orange T-shirt. What does the average Florida State player get on his
SATs?
Drool. How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a
girlfriend?
Tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck. How many Pitt football players does it take to
change a light bulb?
Five. And they each get three credits. University of South Carolina Coach Steve Spurrier
comes into the locker room before practice and says to
his star receiver, "You're failing math. If you don't
want to become academically ineligible, you'll have to
answer these math questions correctly." The star
receiver agrees and Spurrier asks him, "What does 4 plus 4 equal?"
"Eleven," says the athlete.
The rest of the team pleads, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!"
Spurrier then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?"
The receiver says, "Four." The rest of the team yells, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!" How many Florida freshmen football players does it
take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a sophomore course. What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas
cheerleaders in one room?
A full set of teeth. Why is Nebraska's football field artificial turf and
not real grass?
So the cheerleaders won't graze. What are the longest three years of a Florida State
football player's life?
Freshman year. Alabama football coach Nick Saban asked the
freshman walk-on hopeful if he could tackle.
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can tackle."
The coach then asked, "Well, can you run?"
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can run very fast."
Saban then said, "Can you pass a football?" The kid thought for a second and said, "Well, coach, if
I can swallow it, I can probably pass it." If you are driving and see a Miami football player
riding a bicycle, why should you take great care in not
hitting him?
It could be your bike. You are stuck in a cave with an angry grizzly bear, a
mountain lion, and a Texas A&M fan. You have a gun
with two bullets. What should you do?
Shoot the Aggie fan...twice. What do you get if you see an Ohio State fan buried
up to his neck in sand?
More sand. A man asks his friend, "Did you hear about the 22-
year-old babe who married the 93-year-old Alabama
booster? It was a football wedding."
The friend says, "A football wedding?"
"Yeah, she's waiting for him to kick off." The Notre Dame fan was complaining to his friend
about his wife. He said, "My wife thinks I put the
Fighting Irish ahead of our marriage. I disagree. We
just celebrated our fourth season together." How come football isn't a religion this season in the
SEC?
It was put on probation. What do you call 20 Ohio State fans lying on the
lawn?
Fertilizer. How do you get a Nebraska cheerleader into your dorm
room?
Grease her hips and push. Why do Mississippi State football players put their
diplomas on the dashboard?
So they can park in a handicapped spot. Why do Michigan State football players go to movies
in groups of 18 or more?
17 and under not admitted. What is the most common phrase used by a former
Colorado football player?
Would you like fries with that? What do you call a genius sitting in the Arkansas
student section?
Visitor. A young boy and his mother were in the cemetery
visiting the grave of a loved one. They came upon a
headstone that read, "Here lies a Florida State
graduate and an honest man."
The boy then asked his mother, "Mommy, why did they
bury two men in there?" Why did they build a new automobile factory near
Oklahoma State?
Because of the endless supply of crash test dummies
down the street. How did the Georgia football player die from
drinking milk?
The cow fell on him. Did you hear about the Florida State kicker who tried
to throw himself on the floor in a fit of rage?
He missed. What's the difference between a litter of puppies and
Steve Spurrier?
Puppies stop whining after 8 weeks. Two West Virginia football players were walking in
the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."
The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?" How do you keep a Colorado football player out of
your yard?
Put up a goalpost. How can you tell the female student who is a college
football fan from the north from the female student
who is a college football fan from the south?
The female student from the north is a physics major
who understands Sylvia Plath.
The female student from the south is a Miss USA contestant and understands the west coast offense. A Clemson football player was almost killed yesterday
in a tragic horseback-riding accident. He fell from the
horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the
manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged
the horse. A Southern Cal football player was bragging to a
group of co-eds that he finished a jigsaw puzzle in
only three months. One girl said, "Three months?
You're proud of that?"
The Trojan said, "Yep. On the box it said 4-6 years." What do Penn State football players call the elderly?
Coach. What do you say to an Ohio State football player
dressed in a three-piece suit?
Will the defendant please rise. What's the difference between a Pitt cheerleader and
an elephant?
A couple of hundred pounds. When do Florida State players NOT run up the score?
When they are taking their SATs. How can you tell when it's homecoming weekend at
Iowa?
The cheerleaders have braided their armpit hair. What do you get when you drag a $1,000 bill through a
housing project?
A Miami football signee. A man inherited over one billion dollars from a long-
lost uncle who happened to be an oil baron. The man,
thrilled at his good fortune, asked his young son what
he wanted. He told his child that money was no object.
The boy said he wanted a Mickey Mouse outfit. So the
man bought him the University of Colorado. What do you call a 200-pound Michigan State
cheerleader?
Anorexic. If three Florida State football players are in a car,
who is driving?
The police officer. How come female college football fans in the south
don't carry wallets?
That's what dates are for. Received from Artificial Turf. funnies to as
many as possible for free. Thank you all for your
support. If you didn't get a chance to donate during the drive, you are in luck! We accept donations anytime. We just won't nag you about it for the next six months or
so. Thanks, John. */ Why do Nebraska football players like smart women?
Opposites attract. Why was O.J. trying to escape to Knoxville, Tennessee?
Police would never look for a Heisman Trophy winner
there. Why was O.J. considering moving to West Virginia?
Everyone's DNA there is the same. Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?
So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday,
go hunting on Sunday, and wear it to pick up trash on
Monday. How do you get a former Ohio State football player
off your porch?
Pay him for the pizza. An Alabama fan and a Tennessee fan, fighting side-
by-side, were captured during World War II and
sentenced to die by firing squad. The enemy
commander asked the Tennessee fan if he had any last
requests. The Vol said, "I want to hear Rocky Top one
last time." The Bama fan was then asked if he had any last
requests. "Yes, shoot me first!" A man is sitting at a park bench when another man
sits next to him and they engage in conversation.
Shortly after, the second man says, "So, I bet you're a
Texas fan."
The first man says enthusiastically, "Why, yes I am.
How did you know? My intelligence? My wit? My good looks?"
The second fellow says, "No. I saw your class ring when
you were picking your nose." A scrawny man at a bar in Columbus says to the guy
sitting next to him, "Hey, you want to hear a really
funny Ohio State joke?"
The guy replies, "Hey, buddy. See the bartender? He
played at Ohio State. See those two huge guys to your
left? They played at Ohio State. See that group of big guys over at that table? All Ohio State football
players. Look at me. I'm 6'4, 235, and played at Ohio
State. Now are you sure you want to tell me your
joke?"
The scrawny man says, "Nah. I don't want to have to
explain and repeat it five times." How can you spot a Tennessee fan at a wedding?
Just look for the guy in the orange T-shirt. What does the average Florida State player get on his
SATs?
Drool. How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a
girlfriend?
Tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck. How many Pitt football players does it take to
change a light bulb?
Five. And they each get three credits. University of South Carolina Coach Steve Spurrier
comes into the locker room before practice and says to
his star receiver, "You're failing math. If you don't
want to become academically ineligible, you'll have to
answer these math questions correctly." The star
receiver agrees and Spurrier asks him, "What does 4 plus 4 equal?"
"Eleven," says the athlete.
The rest of the team pleads, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!"
Spurrier then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?"
The receiver says, "Four." The rest of the team yells, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!" How many Florida freshmen football players does it
take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a sophomore course. What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas
cheerleaders in one room?
A full set of teeth. Why is Nebraska's football field artificial turf and
not real grass?
So the cheerleaders won't graze. What are the longest three years of a Florida State
football player's life?
Freshman year. Alabama football coach Nick Saban asked the
freshman walk-on hopeful if he could tackle.
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can tackle."
The coach then asked, "Well, can you run?"
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can run very fast."
Saban then said, "Can you pass a football?" The kid thought for a second and said, "Well, coach, if
I can swallow it, I can probably pass it." If you are driving and see a Miami football player
riding a bicycle, why should you take great care in not
hitting him?
It could be your bike. You are stuck in a cave with an angry grizzly bear, a
mountain lion, and a Texas A&M fan. You have a gun
with two bullets. What should you do?
Shoot the Aggie fan...twice. What do you get if you see an Ohio State fan buried
up to his neck in sand?
More sand. A man asks his friend, "Did you hear about the 22-
year-old babe who married the 93-year-old Alabama
booster? It was a football wedding."
The friend says, "A football wedding?"
"Yeah, she's waiting for him to kick off." The Notre Dame fan was complaining to his friend
about his wife. He said, "My wife thinks I put the
Fighting Irish ahead of our marriage. I disagree. We
just celebrated our fourth season together." How come football isn't a religion this season in the
SEC?
It was put on probation. What do you call 20 Ohio State fans lying on the
lawn?
Fertilizer. How do you get a Nebraska cheerleader into your dorm
room?
Grease her hips and push. Why do Mississippi State football players put their
diplomas on the dashboard?
So they can park in a handicapped spot. Why do Michigan State football players go to movies
in groups of 18 or more?
17 and under not admitted. What is the most common phrase used by a former
Colorado football player?
Would you like fries with that? What do you call a genius sitting in the Arkansas
student section?
Visitor. A young boy and his mother were in the cemetery
visiting the grave of a loved one. They came upon a
headstone that read, "Here lies a Florida State
graduate and an honest man."
The boy then asked his mother, "Mommy, why did they
bury two men in there?" Why did they build a new automobile factory near
Oklahoma State?
Because of the endless supply of crash test dummies
down the street. How did the Georgia football player die from
drinking milk?
The cow fell on him. Did you hear about the Florida State kicker who tried
to throw himself on the floor in a fit of rage?
He missed. What's the difference between a litter of puppies and
Steve Spurrier?
Puppies stop whining after 8 weeks. Two West Virginia football players were walking in
the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."
The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?" How do you keep a Colorado football player out of
your yard?
Put up a goalpost. How can you tell the female student who is a college
football fan from the north from the female student
who is a college football fan from the south?
The female student from the north is a physics major
who understands Sylvia Plath.
The female student from the south is a Miss USA contestant and understands the west coast offense. A Clemson football player was almost killed yesterday
in a tragic horseback-riding accident. He fell from the
horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the
manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged
the horse. A Southern Cal football player was bragging to a
group of co-eds that he finished a jigsaw puzzle in
only three months. One girl said, "Three months?
You're proud of that?"
The Trojan said, "Yep. On the box it said 4-6 years." What do Penn State football players call the elderly?
Coach. What do you say to an Ohio State football player
dressed in a three-piece suit?
Will the defendant please rise. What's the difference between a Pitt cheerleader and
an elephant?
A couple of hundred pounds. When do Florida State players NOT run up the score?
When they are taking their SATs. How can you tell when it's homecoming weekend at
Iowa?
The cheerleaders have braided their armpit hair. What do you get when you drag a $1,000 bill through a
housing project?
A Miami football signee. A man inherited over one billion dollars from a long-
lost uncle who happened to be an oil baron. The man,
thrilled at his good fortune, asked his young son what
he wanted. He told his child that money was no object.
The boy said he wanted a Mickey Mouse outfit. So the
man bought him the University of Colorado. What do you call a 200-pound Michigan State
cheerleader?
Anorexic. If three Florida State football players are in a car,
who is driving?
The police officer. How come female college football fans in the south
don't carry wallets?
That's what dates are for. Received from Artificial Turf.
end, I want you all to know I really appreciate your
continued generosity and commitment to GCFL. We
plan to continue sending good, clean funnies to as
many as possible for free. Thank you all for your
support. If you didn't get a chance to donate during the drive, you are in luck! We accept donations anytime. We just won't nag you about it for the next six months or
so. Thanks, John. */ Why do Nebraska football players like smart women?
Opposites attract. Why was O.J. trying to escape to Knoxville, Tennessee?
Police would never look for a Heisman Trophy winner
there. Why was O.J. considering moving to West Virginia?
Everyone's DNA there is the same. Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?
So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday,
go hunting on Sunday, and wear it to pick up trash on
Monday. How do you get a former Ohio State football player
off your porch?
Pay him for the pizza. An Alabama fan and a Tennessee fan, fighting side-
by-side, were captured during World War II and
sentenced to die by firing squad. The enemy
commander asked the Tennessee fan if he had any last
requests. The Vol said, "I want to hear Rocky Top one
last time." The Bama fan was then asked if he had any last
requests. "Yes, shoot me first!" A man is sitting at a park bench when another man
sits next to him and they engage in conversation.
Shortly after, the second man says, "So, I bet you're a
Texas fan."
The first man says enthusiastically, "Why, yes I am.
How did you know? My intelligence? My wit? My good looks?"
The second fellow says, "No. I saw your class ring when
you were picking your nose." A scrawny man at a bar in Columbus says to the guy
sitting next to him, "Hey, you want to hear a really
funny Ohio State joke?"
The guy replies, "Hey, buddy. See the bartender? He
played at Ohio State. See those two huge guys to your
left? They played at Ohio State. See that group of big guys over at that table? All Ohio State football
players. Look at me. I'm 6'4, 235, and played at Ohio
State. Now are you sure you want to tell me your
joke?"
The scrawny man says, "Nah. I don't want to have to
explain and repeat it five times." How can you spot a Tennessee fan at a wedding?
Just look for the guy in the orange T-shirt. What does the average Florida State player get on his
SATs?
Drool. How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a
girlfriend?
Tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck. How many Pitt football players does it take to
change a light bulb?
Five. And they each get three credits. University of South Carolina Coach Steve Spurrier
comes into the locker room before practice and says to
his star receiver, "You're failing math. If you don't
want to become academically ineligible, you'll have to
answer these math questions correctly." The star
receiver agrees and Spurrier asks him, "What does 4 plus 4 equal?"
"Eleven," says the athlete.
The rest of the team pleads, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!"
Spurrier then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?"
The receiver says, "Four." The rest of the team yells, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!" How many Florida freshmen football players does it
take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a sophomore course. What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas
cheerleaders in one room?
A full set of teeth. Why is Nebraska's football field artificial turf and
not real grass?
So the cheerleaders won't graze. What are the longest three years of a Florida State
football player's life?
Freshman year. Alabama football coach Nick Saban asked the
freshman walk-on hopeful if he could tackle.
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can tackle."
The coach then asked, "Well, can you run?"
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can run very fast."
Saban then said, "Can you pass a football?" The kid thought for a second and said, "Well, coach, if
I can swallow it, I can probably pass it." If you are driving and see a Miami football player
riding a bicycle, why should you take great care in not
hitting him?
It could be your bike. You are stuck in a cave with an angry grizzly bear, a
mountain lion, and a Texas A&M fan. You have a gun
with two bullets. What should you do?
Shoot the Aggie fan...twice. What do you get if you see an Ohio State fan buried
up to his neck in sand?
More sand. A man asks his friend, "Did you hear about the 22-
year-old babe who married the 93-year-old Alabama
booster? It was a football wedding."
The friend says, "A football wedding?"
"Yeah, she's waiting for him to kick off." The Notre Dame fan was complaining to his friend
about his wife. He said, "My wife thinks I put the
Fighting Irish ahead of our marriage. I disagree. We
just celebrated our fourth season together." How come football isn't a religion this season in the
SEC?
It was put on probation. What do you call 20 Ohio State fans lying on the
lawn?
Fertilizer. How do you get a Nebraska cheerleader into your dorm
room?
Grease her hips and push. Why do Mississippi State football players put their
diplomas on the dashboard?
So they can park in a handicapped spot. Why do Michigan State football players go to movies
in groups of 18 or more?
17 and under not admitted. What is the most common phrase used by a former
Colorado football player?
Would you like fries with that? What do you call a genius sitting in the Arkansas
student section?
Visitor. A young boy and his mother were in the cemetery
visiting the grave of a loved one. They came upon a
headstone that read, "Here lies a Florida State
graduate and an honest man."
The boy then asked his mother, "Mommy, why did they
bury two men in there?" Why did they build a new automobile factory near
Oklahoma State?
Because of the endless supply of crash test dummies
down the street. How did the Georgia football player die from
drinking milk?
The cow fell on him. Did you hear about the Florida State kicker who tried
to throw himself on the floor in a fit of rage?
He missed. What's the difference between a litter of puppies and
Steve Spurrier?
Puppies stop whining after 8 weeks. Two West Virginia football players were walking in
the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."
The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?" How do you keep a Colorado football player out of
your yard?
Put up a goalpost. How can you tell the female student who is a college
football fan from the north from the female student
who is a college football fan from the south?
The female student from the north is a physics major
who understands Sylvia Plath.
The female student from the south is a Miss USA contestant and understands the west coast offense. A Clemson football player was almost killed yesterday
in a tragic horseback-riding accident. He fell from the
horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the
manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged
the horse. A Southern Cal football player was bragging to a
group of co-eds that he finished a jigsaw puzzle in
only three months. One girl said, "Three months?
You're proud of that?"
The Trojan said, "Yep. On the box it said 4-6 years." What do Penn State football players call the elderly?
Coach. What do you say to an Ohio State football player
dressed in a three-piece suit?
Will the defendant please rise. What's the difference between a Pitt cheerleader and
an elephant?
A couple of hundred pounds. When do Florida State players NOT run up the score?
When they are taking their SATs. How can you tell when it's homecoming weekend at
Iowa?
The cheerleaders have braided their armpit hair. What do you get when you drag a $1,000 bill through a
housing project?
A Miami football signee. A man inherited over one billion dollars from a long-
lost uncle who happened to be an oil baron. The man,
thrilled at his good fortune, asked his young son what
he wanted. He told his child that money was no object.
The boy said he wanted a Mickey Mouse outfit. So the
man bought him the University of Colorado. What do you call a 200-pound Michigan State
cheerleader?
Anorexic. If three Florida State football players are in a car,
who is driving?
The police officer. How come female college football fans in the south
don't carry wallets?
That's what dates are for. Received from Artificial Turf. funnies to as
many as possible for free. Thank you all for your
support. If you didn't get a chance to donate during the drive, you are in luck! We accept donations anytime. We just won't nag you about it for the next six months or
so. Thanks, John. */ Why do Nebraska football players like smart women?
Opposites attract. Why was O.J. trying to escape to Knoxville, Tennessee?
Police would never look for a Heisman Trophy winner
there. Why was O.J. considering moving to West Virginia?
Everyone's DNA there is the same. Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?
So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday,
go hunting on Sunday, and wear it to pick up trash on
Monday. How do you get a former Ohio State football player
off your porch?
Pay him for the pizza. An Alabama fan and a Tennessee fan, fighting side-
by-side, were captured during World War II and
sentenced to die by firing squad. The enemy
commander asked the Tennessee fan if he had any last
requests. The Vol said, "I want to hear Rocky Top one
last time." The Bama fan was then asked if he had any last
requests. "Yes, shoot me first!" A man is sitting at a park bench when another man
sits next to him and they engage in conversation.
Shortly after, the second man says, "So, I bet you're a
Texas fan."
The first man says enthusiastically, "Why, yes I am.
How did you know? My intelligence? My wit? My good looks?"
The second fellow says, "No. I saw your class ring when
you were picking your nose." A scrawny man at a bar in Columbus says to the guy
sitting next to him, "Hey, you want to hear a really
funny Ohio State joke?"
The guy replies, "Hey, buddy. See the bartender? He
played at Ohio State. See those two huge guys to your
left? They played at Ohio State. See that group of big guys over at that table? All Ohio State football
players. Look at me. I'm 6'4, 235, and played at Ohio
State. Now are you sure you want to tell me your
joke?"
The scrawny man says, "Nah. I don't want to have to
explain and repeat it five times." How can you spot a Tennessee fan at a wedding?
Just look for the guy in the orange T-shirt. What does the average Florida State player get on his
SATs?
Drool. How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a
girlfriend?
Tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck. How many Pitt football players does it take to
change a light bulb?
Five. And they each get three credits. University of South Carolina Coach Steve Spurrier
comes into the locker room before practice and says to
his star receiver, "You're failing math. If you don't
want to become academically ineligible, you'll have to
answer these math questions correctly." The star
receiver agrees and Spurrier asks him, "What does 4 plus 4 equal?"
"Eleven," says the athlete.
The rest of the team pleads, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!"
Spurrier then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?"
The receiver says, "Four." The rest of the team yells, "Give him another chance!
Give him another chance!" How many Florida freshmen football players does it
take to change a light bulb?
None. That's a sophomore course. What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas
cheerleaders in one room?
A full set of teeth. Why is Nebraska's football field artificial turf and
not real grass?
So the cheerleaders won't graze. What are the longest three years of a Florida State
football player's life?
Freshman year. Alabama football coach Nick Saban asked the
freshman walk-on hopeful if he could tackle.
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can tackle."
The coach then asked, "Well, can you run?"
The kid said, "Yes, sir coach, I can run very fast."
Saban then said, "Can you pass a football?" The kid thought for a second and said, "Well, coach, if
I can swallow it, I can probably pass it." If you are driving and see a Miami football player
riding a bicycle, why should you take great care in not
hitting him?
It could be your bike. You are stuck in a cave with an angry grizzly bear, a
mountain lion, and a Texas A&M fan. You have a gun
with two bullets. What should you do?
Shoot the Aggie fan...twice. What do you get if you see an Ohio State fan buried
up to his neck in sand?
More sand. A man asks his friend, "Did you hear about the 22-
year-old babe who married the 93-year-old Alabama
booster? It was a football wedding."
The friend says, "A football wedding?"
"Yeah, she's waiting for him to kick off." The Notre Dame fan was complaining to his friend
about his wife. He said, "My wife thinks I put the
Fighting Irish ahead of our marriage. I disagree. We
just celebrated our fourth season together." How come football isn't a religion this season in the
SEC?
It was put on probation. What do you call 20 Ohio State fans lying on the
lawn?
Fertilizer. How do you get a Nebraska cheerleader into your dorm
room?
Grease her hips and push. Why do Mississippi State football players put their
diplomas on the dashboard?
So they can park in a handicapped spot. Why do Michigan State football players go to movies
in groups of 18 or more?
17 and under not admitted. What is the most common phrase used by a former
Colorado football player?
Would you like fries with that? What do you call a genius sitting in the Arkansas
student section?
Visitor. A young boy and his mother were in the cemetery
visiting the grave of a loved one. They came upon a
headstone that read, "Here lies a Florida State
graduate and an honest man."
The boy then asked his mother, "Mommy, why did they
bury two men in there?" Why did they build a new automobile factory near
Oklahoma State?
Because of the endless supply of crash test dummies
down the street. How did the Georgia football player die from
drinking milk?
The cow fell on him. Did you hear about the Florida State kicker who tried
to throw himself on the floor in a fit of rage?
He missed. What's the difference between a litter of puppies and
Steve Spurrier?
Puppies stop whining after 8 weeks. Two West Virginia football players were walking in
the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."
The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?" How do you keep a Colorado football player out of
your yard?
Put up a goalpost. How can you tell the female student who is a college
football fan from the north from the female student
who is a college football fan from the south?
The female student from the north is a physics major
who understands Sylvia Plath.
The female student from the south is a Miss USA contestant and understands the west coast offense. A Clemson football player was almost killed yesterday
in a tragic horseback-riding accident. He fell from the
horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the
manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged
the horse. A Southern Cal football player was bragging to a
group of co-eds that he finished a jigsaw puzzle in
only three months. One girl said, "Three months?
You're proud of that?"
The Trojan said, "Yep. On the box it said 4-6 years." What do Penn State football players call the elderly?
Coach. What do you say to an Ohio State football player
dressed in a three-piece suit?
Will the defendant please rise. What's the difference between a Pitt cheerleader and
an elephant?
A couple of hundred pounds. When do Florida State players NOT run up the score?
When they are taking their SATs. How can you tell when it's homecoming weekend at
Iowa?
The cheerleaders have braided their armpit hair. What do you get when you drag a $1,000 bill through a
housing project?
A Miami football signee. A man inherited over one billion dollars from a long-
lost uncle who happened to be an oil baron. The man,
thrilled at his good fortune, asked his young son what
he wanted. He told his child that money was no object.
The boy said he wanted a Mickey Mouse outfit. So the
man bought him the University of Colorado. What do you call a 200-pound Michigan State
cheerleader?
Anorexic. If three Florida State football players are in a car,
who is driving?
The police officer. How come female college football fans in the south
don't carry wallets?
That's what dates are for. Received from Artificial Turf.
(Joke) Have Fun
A man approached a local person in a village he was visiting. “What’s the quickest way to York?” The local scratched his head. “Are you walking or driving?” he asked the stranger. “I’m driving.” “That’s the quickest way!”
Way to Make Your Girl Happy
In the world of romance, one single rule
applies: Make the woman happy. Do
something she likes, and you get points. Do
something she dislikes and points are
subtracted. You don’t get any points for
doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the points system: SIMPLE DUTIES You make the bed (+1) You make the bed, but forget to add
the decorative pillows (0) You throw the bedspread over rumpled
sheets (-1) You leave the toilet seat up (-5)slikes and points are
subtracted. You don’t get any points for
doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the points system: SIMPLE DUTIES You make the bed (+1) You make the bed, but forget to add
the decorative pillows (0) You throw the bedspread over rumpled
sheets (-1) You leave the toilet seat up (-5)
applies: Make the woman happy. Do
something she likes, and you get points. Do
something she dislikes and points are
subtracted. You don’t get any points for
doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the points system: SIMPLE DUTIES You make the bed (+1) You make the bed, but forget to add
the decorative pillows (0) You throw the bedspread over rumpled
sheets (-1) You leave the toilet seat up (-5)slikes and points are
subtracted. You don’t get any points for
doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the points system: SIMPLE DUTIES You make the bed (+1) You make the bed, but forget to add
the decorative pillows (0) You throw the bedspread over rumpled
sheets (-1) You leave the toilet seat up (-5)
(Joke) Japanese Study In USA
(Joke) Japanese Study In USA
First day of school in an American high school in
Washington DC. The teacher introduces the new kid,
Suzuki Yamaguchi from Japan to the rest of the class.
As the class start, the teacher says: "Let's start with a
small quiz in American history". Who said "Freedom or
death?" Suddenly silence... ...and only Suzuki raises his hand: "Patrick Henry, 1775. in Philadelphia. "Very
good Suzuki". And who said: "The nation is it's people
and as such can never die? Suzuki raises his hand
again: "Abraham Lincoln, 1863, Washington. The
teacher looks at her students and says: "Shame on you,
Suzuki is a Japanese and know American history better than you. A silent voice from the back of the class: "Go
fuck yourselves, shitt Japanese "Who said that!?", yells
the teacher. Suzuki raises his hand and says: "General
MacArthur, 1942, Guadalcanalu, and Lee Iacocca 1982
at the Chrysler management board meeting, Detroit.
The class is in silence and hear again a silent voice: "Suck my cock!!! The teacher is furious: "I've had
enough. Who said that? Suzuki : "Bill Clinton to
Monica Levinsky, Oval Office, 1997 in Washington.
Another voice yells: "Suzuki is shitt! Suzuki :
"Valentino Rossi in Rio de Janeiro at the Brazil moto
Grand-Prix in 2002. The class goes wild, the teacher starts crying, and in walks to the school Principal she
said: "What the hell is going on?, I am going to quit !!
Suzuki raises his hand again : "Sri Mulyani, Ministry
of Finance, Jakarta, Indonesia, 2010 when KPK
auditors were in her office
First day of school in an American high school in
Washington DC. The teacher introduces the new kid,
Suzuki Yamaguchi from Japan to the rest of the class.
As the class start, the teacher says: "Let's start with a
small quiz in American history". Who said "Freedom or
death?" Suddenly silence... ...and only Suzuki raises his hand: "Patrick Henry, 1775. in Philadelphia. "Very
good Suzuki". And who said: "The nation is it's people
and as such can never die? Suzuki raises his hand
again: "Abraham Lincoln, 1863, Washington. The
teacher looks at her students and says: "Shame on you,
Suzuki is a Japanese and know American history better than you. A silent voice from the back of the class: "Go
fuck yourselves, shitt Japanese "Who said that!?", yells
the teacher. Suzuki raises his hand and says: "General
MacArthur, 1942, Guadalcanalu, and Lee Iacocca 1982
at the Chrysler management board meeting, Detroit.
The class is in silence and hear again a silent voice: "Suck my cock!!! The teacher is furious: "I've had
enough. Who said that? Suzuki : "Bill Clinton to
Monica Levinsky, Oval Office, 1997 in Washington.
Another voice yells: "Suzuki is shitt! Suzuki :
"Valentino Rossi in Rio de Janeiro at the Brazil moto
Grand-Prix in 2002. The class goes wild, the teacher starts crying, and in walks to the school Principal she
said: "What the hell is going on?, I am going to quit !!
Suzuki raises his hand again : "Sri Mulyani, Ministry
of Finance, Jakarta, Indonesia, 2010 when KPK
auditors were in her office
TRIK INTERNET GRATIS TELKOMSEL DISEMUA BROWSER 26 September 2011
Welcome Back All,, ketemu lagi nih ,, Melihat dari judul di atas apakah kalian percaya dan yakin trik
ini benar ? atau hanya tipuan seperti Trik Telkomsel Semua Serba Gratis seperti yang ku posting kemaren???? Hahahahah,, yang pastinya trik ini benar2 Trik
Internet Gratis Disemua Browser - 2011 termasuk
Browser HP, Operamini, UC Browser, Bolt Browser ,
QQBrowser, OviBrowser dan sebangsanya...
Langsung ke Topik.... Setelah melihat kesuksesan beberapa Proxy Website
terkenal sprti Facebook, CitronGo, Yahoo dan banyak
lgi yang sukses berperan sebagai IP Sakti gratisan
Telkomsel. aku jadi berfikir untuk mencoba
menggunakan DNS Sang Raksasa Internet , Google,
yang merupakan situs Nomor #1 didunia ini dan hasilnya Wooowwwwwwww... benar2 GRATIS CUYYYY.... mau bukti ??? buktiin aja sendiri yuk !!! ==Set HP==
HOMEPAGE: http://gprs.5hd.net/
APN: 3gprs atau AHA
PROXY: 008.008.008.008 atau 004.004.004.004
PORT: 8000
Nokia Java (S40) Wajib make File Prov
Saya rasa cukup segini dulu,,, Utk App browser sprti
Opmin dan teman2 nya perlu kesabaran dan jika
gagal koneksi, ulangi smpe berhasil.. (biasanya 2X
gagal) ... -Yang Copas/Edit/Share ulang tolong sertakan Link Sumber , Ochey
ini benar ? atau hanya tipuan seperti Trik Telkomsel Semua Serba Gratis seperti yang ku posting kemaren???? Hahahahah,, yang pastinya trik ini benar2 Trik
Internet Gratis Disemua Browser - 2011 termasuk
Browser HP, Operamini, UC Browser, Bolt Browser ,
QQBrowser, OviBrowser dan sebangsanya...
Langsung ke Topik.... Setelah melihat kesuksesan beberapa Proxy Website
terkenal sprti Facebook, CitronGo, Yahoo dan banyak
lgi yang sukses berperan sebagai IP Sakti gratisan
Telkomsel. aku jadi berfikir untuk mencoba
menggunakan DNS Sang Raksasa Internet , Google,
yang merupakan situs Nomor #1 didunia ini dan hasilnya Wooowwwwwwww... benar2 GRATIS CUYYYY.... mau bukti ??? buktiin aja sendiri yuk !!! ==Set HP==
HOMEPAGE: http://gprs.5hd.net/
APN: 3gprs atau AHA
PROXY: 008.008.008.008 atau 004.004.004.004
PORT: 8000
Nokia Java (S40) Wajib make File Prov
Saya rasa cukup segini dulu,,, Utk App browser sprti
Opmin dan teman2 nya perlu kesabaran dan jika
gagal koneksi, ulangi smpe berhasil.. (biasanya 2X
gagal) ... -Yang Copas/Edit/Share ulang tolong sertakan Link Sumber , Ochey
Hot!! Trik Internet Gratis Indosat Melalui UcWeb Update 26 September 2011
perasaan aku ga pernah posting trik indosat..tp skarang untuk melengkapi mka akan aku share juga trik Internet Gratis Indosat Menggunakan Ucweb...
Tidak usah panjang lebar.. Syarat :
1. Kartu im3 baru (yg lama aku ga jamin bisa) 2. Kirim 2 sms dulu..
3. Gunakan proxy : 76.126.123.199
port : 80
4. Setan UcWeb handler :
=type proxy : http
host : 0.facebook.com kalau tidak jalan di Host..gnakan pada proxy server.
5. Pulsa di atas Rp. 1000
nb : trik ini masih jalan,jd cpt" d manfaatin..pulsa ttp trpotong hngga rp.5-10.. jgn lupa kment nya ea. . .hehe.jpg"/>
perasaan aku ga pernah posting trik indosat..tp skarang untuk melengkapi mka akan aku share juga trik Internet Gratis Indosat Menggunakan Ucweb...
Tidak usah panjang lebar.. Syarat :
1. Kartu im3 baru (yg lama aku ga jamin bisa) 2. Kirim 2 sms dulu..
3. Gunakan proxy : 76.126.123.199
port : 80
4. Setan UcWeb handler :
=type proxy : http
host : 0.facebook.com kalau tidak jalan di Host..gnakan pada proxy server.
5. Pulsa di atas Rp. 1000
nb : trik ini masih jalan,jd cpt" d manfaatin..pulsa ttp trpotong hngga rp.5-10.. jgn lupa kment nya ea. . .hehe
Hot!! Trik Internet Gratis Telkomsel 26 September 2011
Sebelumnya aku turut berduka cita atas kematian trik ekor 132..
Tapi mau apa lagi,mungkin ajalnya sdah sampe..ckckck
oke bagi kamu2 yg haus akan gretong,
gak ada salahnya mencoba trik tsel yg satu ini :
proxy : 82.145.210.0
porototot : 80
nah,ckup smpe disini dulu postingan q kali ini,,
jangan lupa coment nya ea..
Tapi mau apa lagi,mungkin ajalnya sdah sampe..ckckck
oke bagi kamu2 yg haus akan gretong,
gak ada salahnya mencoba trik tsel yg satu ini :
proxy : 82.145.210.0
porototot : 80
nah,ckup smpe disini dulu postingan q kali ini,,
jangan lupa coment nya ea..
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